Tony’s Feelings

This school didn’t give the students the privilege of choosing their own subjects, for freshmen and sophomore years at least. The school was changing its systems according to the new programme they intended to implement in the school. Because of that, it was sort of a mess for quite a few years, but luckily this story isn’t about the school but rather the boy who couldn’t get what he’s always wanted. A 15 year old boy named Anthony Johnson had never been in a relationship before, but so much desired a partner for himself. During freshmen year he had developed a crush on a girl named Katy, Katelyn Smith who was in his class. At first, he thought nothing of the sort with this girl. However, after being assigned to sit together, he eventually developed what you would call “a crush” on her. It was subtle at first, he just thought she was pretty and gorgeous, but then as time went by they talked more often. Then one night, Anthony decided to start a conversation with her on Messenger and he did. It was going well, too well to be honest, and that’s when he got his nickname, Tony. It wasn’t a big thing and it wasn’t even anything special, but for him, her calling him what she came up with was very much special. They were getting along well and the class slowly noticed that they were much closer than they seemed just a few months ago. They recognized the two as friends, just friends. But they were doing well, they were closer than just friends. It only occurred to him at the end of the school year that he was infatuated with her. Her smile, her laugh, her presence was what he wanted and what he could’ve gotten if it hadn’t gotten so... distant in one day. In just one day... in just one moment... with one word his heart was forever thrown into the depths of his feelings. An ocean deeper and larger than any on earth, waters that were much more than every single drop of water on Earth. During those three summer months he had been regretting for waiting, contemplating if he could move on, wishing he had asked sooner. He would occasionally call her and talk a little. A friend he became, and a friend he remained. His feelings were unstable during those months and he couldn’t stop thinking about her, about how things could’ve been different. He started getting irritated, frustrated with his decisions and he couldn’t help but stay up late and play games, watch movies and animes to drown his echoing voice inside his head. His feelings were still lingering in his head but he knew that he had to accept reality, that even if he couldn’t move on he had to start living his normal life. The summer left him with those thoughts and a new school year started. As he still tried to be her friend and not leave her with empty reasons he held a grudge against her boyfriend, who had asked her out before the summer started and stole his only desire. But soon, these thoughts were to be replaced by a whole new set of regrets...