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Toxic Friend

Goodbye.

Image from elitedaily.com

This is the story of why I cut ties with my best friend.

If you’re unhappy with your friend, you need to say something. I have been friends with my best friend for years, and I have never stood up for myself. She always came to me when she needed support or advice. But whenever I needed a shoulder to cry on, she always disappeared.

A few nights ago, I was going through something with my boyfriend, and I needed my best friend. I was on FaceTime with her crying, and asked her to come over. She said she would, she never did. The next morning I woke up to get on Snapchat to see she went out to the club that night.

She chose the party instead of comforting a friend in need. This isn’t the first time this has happened.

We had plans to go to Miami for spring break, and she ended up cancelling our plans without letting me know, and started talking about going with one of her friends.

I could never stand up for myself when it came to her. Anytime I did, especially if we were driving, she would tell me to get out of the car. If I didn’t do something she liked, she wouldn’t talk to me for days. I used to get upset when she did things like that. But now I realize, I shouldn’t get upset. She is a toxic friend, and our friendship is completely one sided.

If we get into an argument, she comes at me and brings up my family issues, or my relationship issues, even though that’s not what we were arguing about. For her, it seems like she’s always thinking “how can I make her upset next?”

She never really cared about me. I gave her so much. I gave her a place to stay when she needed it, I gave her a shoulder to cry on, and more. Do I regret doing that? No, because she needed it. Would I do it again? No.

I am no longer being friends with her for my benefit. I am in a happy relationship, and all she brings up anytime I’m happy with him is the things that have happened in the past. Things we have moved past. I trust him 100 percent, and she should not try to change that.

I’m going to focus on myself, and my relationship, and focus on getting myself happy, and keeping my relationship stable and positive. Losing a friend normally hurts a lot, because you created this bond with them, especially a person you considered family for years.

Surprisingly, this doesn’t hurt. I already feel happier knowing I’m not going to have that negativity in my life. I feel happier knowing I don’t have to give my all to someone and get nothing in return. I can finally be my own person, and do what makes me happy.

If you are ever in a toxic friendship, just take a step back, and think, “would I be happier without this person in my life in the long run? Would I be able to do more things if this person wasn’t in my life?” If you answered yes to those questions, I strongly suggest you make a decision. You already know that you’re unhappy, so why keep in contact? Why put yourself through that? You don’t have to make yourself upset, or keep your mouth shut just to keep someone happy. You need to focus on yourself, and things that actually make you happy. If it hurts you at first, it will get better.

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