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Toxic Relationships: What Are They and How to Get Help

Toxic relationships are sometimes life-threatening, how can we, as humans, avoid these, and how can we get help?

What are relationships? And what happens when they become toxic?

Toxic relationships really are more than common these days, especially within young adults 16-24, the statistics say that more than 60% of young adults are in toxic relationships (physically abusive or psychologically abusive, or both). 

The question I ask myself is, how can we (as humans) deal with these relationships, and how can we get help and get out of these hideous relationships as soon as we can? 

This article will obviously help you, but won't provide an answer, so as always, I suggest reading this for guidance, but please talk to a professional to get proper help.

I was in a toxic relationship when I was 16, and it lasted for two years, the mental and physical abuse was horrible, I couldn't go out without him texting me every second asking when I'm home, who I'm with, what I'm doing, he would also text my friends to make sure I was where I said I was.

I would see him pretty much all the time because I was so blinded by love that I didn't see that what he was doing to me was wrong. He would guilt trip me into seeing him all the time, even when I had arranged to meet up with friends, I would drop all my plans to see him because I was afraid he would hurt me.

I soon learnt that the mental abuse would turn physical too, he would beat me, mainly punching me in the face, backing me into corners to threaten me, slammed me into a door, everything. 

So I found a way to fight back, to gain some control in my life, and to finally have the courage to say "no," I actually spoke to a counsellor through "iTalk" now, if you've never heard of them, I suggest you look them up, I spoke about how he was abusing me, and asked them how I can go about getting out of this. I was half scared to death he would find out that someone else knew he was doing this to me, because I was scared he would hurt me further. 

Finding my way out of the relationship was hard, he eventually dumped me first over Facebook, telling me how he didn't want me anymore, and how I was completely useless as a human being, as sad as this is, I felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders, a sigh of relief came out of me.

I finally realised that the long two years that I had endured was finally over, but the counselling continues, not just because of the abuse from him, but from the PTSD and Depression I have as a result of that. I will NEVER forgive him, and I will never forget, I think that is the result. 

Finding help about this issue is never easy, but approaching someone (maybe your GP or doctor?) can really help ease your mind. The GP can refer you to specialist councillors who deal with young people to help you in the best way they can. Furthermore, they can guide you into the right state of mind and help you through the different stages of trying to get out of toxic relationships.

Not everyone has the same toxic relationship experience; everyone is different, but what we can all do is draw on our experiences and read about others too, so we can all come together to share our story and make everyone aware that this IS happening.

 Saying "no" is never easy. {{lease, if you or someone you know is in a toxic relationship, please please get help before it's too late.

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