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Everyone tries to find someone to love through the good times and the bad times. Not all of us come across this person until it's a time when we need them the most. This being said there are two types of love that we will all face as we're growing up. True love, the kind of love that stays no matter what and fake love, the one that lies, manipulates, and possibly takes advantage of you.
Fake love sucks.
After losing the most important person in my life it took a huge tole on me. I was just starting high school and didn't have too many friends. From ninth grade to 11th grade I went through an abusive relationship with what I thought would be the last time I'd deal with one. Not likely.
11th grade I met who I thought was a great guy that I got along with quite well. After eight months of dating he asked me to marry him by handing me a ring and without thinking I said yes. By the time I graduated I had moved into his place. In the beginning it was all completely normal us doing usual couple things. Then came the things that made me leave the way I did.
Not even a month into the marriage everything started to fall apart one after the other. It started with the yelling while throwing things at me then the manipulation and lying. Anything wrong that he did wasn't ever his fault it was always mine meaning I had to apologize. He constantly lied to my family about money along with lying to me about reasons I shouldn't drive or reasons I should stay in one room all day with no one to talk to, but him. As the mental, physical, and emotional abuse got worse I myself got worse. By the time I left to be able to file for a divorce I weighed 60 pounds and didn't have all of my things. The day I left he had scared me so bad I had to go back home.
There are no signs when "fake love" like this happens to anyone and for me personally I didn't know how to leave. Being as scared as I was those months of being there I had no idea on how to leave without it ending badly.
True Love = Real Love
It's been a few years since the incidents have happened to me. Now the third month last year I met who I'm for sure is the love of my life. We met and went on quite a few dates then I ended up moving in. With going to college online and trying to balance life things are not always easy, but I have an amazing person in my life. He's been here through quite a lot of things. From dealing with my depression to the weird phases I've dealt with for years now. Our relationship isn't a one way street like some people might think. We both clean, cook, game together, shop together, and most of the time watch TV together. Talking things out with each other is a huge deal, leaving or "breaking up" isn't an option. Something we for sure both go by. I know to a few people it might sound like a perfect love story, but nothing is perfect in the world. There are days we've argued, there are days he's stressed from working, and days where one of us isn't feeling so great. Yes, there are more good days than bad we're just not perfect. True love for sure though.
Future Ideas—House Designing
As a random add I've been thinking a lot about house designs mostly the inside with different rooms. Oddly enough he's had "house fever" where he'll find places online and save where he found them. Should we get a new place? Maybe one day hopefully.
For a few months now I keep thinking of ways to add or change different rooms where we live now. From building a slightly bigger closet for our clothes to possibly painting the desk in my college space. Why? I have no idea, but thoughts about the future have happened way more now than ever. Even the possibility of having kids one day.