Tuesday Night Affairs

How can your life turn upside-down in just a matter of seconds? How can you lose everything you have worked for just because of a stupid mistake? How can you turn back time? These were the questions that kept popping up in Jean’s head while she stood perfectly still watching the ocean. She had come to the island thinking that staring at the vast ocean would put all her problems into perspective. But she was wrong. The burden of her mistakes were so heavy that there wasn’t room for anything else.

Not only had she managed to break apart two lovely families in the last 72 hours, but she had also managed to drive away the last person that stood by her. Who had she become?

When Jean was fifteen, she stood outside the bathroom door and heard her mother desperately cry over Jean’s father. He had had an affair with a much younger woman. Well—does it still count as an affair when there is a whole other family involved? So, at fifteen, Jean learned that she had a half-brother and sister, ages two and five. She also learned that men can’t be trusted and that cheaters are the worst kinds of people, and deserve a place in hell right alongside Hitler. That day, she swore to never cheat in a relationship, and to never stand by a cheater.

It was only natural that now, twenty years later, standing in front of the not-so-calming-ocean, she wanted to rip her insides out at the mere thought of what she had done. Oh—but how good had it felt when his arms were around her, when the only thought that kept popping in her head was the desire for more: the furtive looks, the electric touch of his skin against hers. She had enjoyed the affair, she had relished in this new self she had found, in this pleasure that wasn’t like anything she had felt before.

She kept it going even after he said they should stop. She threw caution to the wind and started being careless. She would run out of excuses to give to her husband, and she wouldn’t even care. So when she got caught, a part of her wasn’t even surprised. In fact, a part of her was waiting for this to happen. Because once she was caught, she thought, that would be her ticket to freedom. Once she was caught, she could enjoy all this little pleasure tenfold, without any worries, without a schedule—she could be free. Finally.

What Jean didn’t anticipate was that Brent would stay with his family and that his wife would take him back, leaving Jane all alone. At least for now.

January 22nd was a regular Tuesday for Jane. She had only one more errand to run before she could get home to watch her shows and wait for Carl to arrive. When she arrived at the shopping mall and saw the ad for Johnny’s Pizza, she couldn’t resist. So, even though she just started her New Year’s Diet, she walked through the door determined to order the pizza, pick up the laundry next door, come back for the pizza and be home in less-than 30 minutes, which would leave her with plenty of time to watch her shows; that was, until she ran into Brent.

Brent had been a longtime family friend and had recently married one of Jane’s best friends from college, Leah. So when Jane saw him standing in line, her first natural impulse was to say hello. However, when he turned around, with that huge pearly smile of his, and those hazelnut eyes, Jane found herself feeling a little overwhelmed. “Jane, it's so nice to see you!” he said, as he pulled her in for a tight embrace. What was this that Jane was feeling in her stomach? Butterflies? I must be getting sick, she thought.

Time flew by that first Tuesday, and Jane found herself enjoying the conversation and the company, more than she had enjoyed anything in quite a while. So, to her surprise, she missed her shows that day, and was feeling a little confused about this encounter when she parked at her garage at midnight that Tuesday night.

Now, when she thinks of that first Tuesday night, she can’t really recall how it all started. She remembers vaguely that Brent had gotten into a fight with Leah that night, and was therefore trying to get some fresh air, that’s how he had ended up at the pizzeria in the first place. She remembers how, when they said their goodbyes, he had lingered a little bit more-than-usual for the hug and had looked her straight in the eyes trying to get a message across. How different had everything been back then; how innocent had it all been. If only she could go back and change a few things, but now it was too late.