Many people greatly romanticize the twin flame relationship. While it's true that it absolutely will be the most intense relationship you have ever or will ever have, it is important to remember what a twin soul or twin flame relationship IS and what it is NOT.
A twin soul relationship is not meant to be for your romantic or sexual indulgences. It is meant to be deeply healing in every level.
A twin soul relationship is not going to be easy. It will challenge you in ways you never expected and will force you to grow into your best self. This is not always easy.
A twin soul relationship is not going to be comparable to anything you've known as love. It is a deep, true, unconditional love.
I met my twin soul online at the end of July. From the very first message, I absolutely knew things were completely different. I KNEW him and I felt he knew me. There was no where I could hide, he knew me in every way. We met in person on a beach the following day, and from the second we saw each other, we both knew. THIS was IT. We were drawn to each other like magnets.
We talked all night, telling each other things that no one else knew. We were completely comfortable with each other and there was this real feeling of returning home. There was total trust and acceptance from the first second we met. He told me that he loved me and that he knew we would be married.
In the weeks that followed, he had a full blown Kundalini awakening. He didn't know what it was, but I did. I told him what it was. He called it the "rototilli" experience, and even now, we jokingly refer to it as that. The powerful experience of this energy flowing up his spine lasted a full day.
He called a friend and told him about meeting me and about his Kundalini awakening and his friend told him that he had met his twin soul. He excitedly called me to tell me this. Of course, I already knew.
In the months that followed, both of our lives completely fell apart. Truly, all of the things we thought were stable in our lives we just torn down. It was extremely difficult while we were in it. We grew closer through it all, turning to each other for comfort.
Both of our lives are so different since meeting. All of the superficial structures that weren't supportive of our authentic selves, were stripped away. More importantly, WE are both totally different people. We have both evolved exponentially as spiritual beings. I know it wouldn't have happened if we hadn't found each other. Even though at times I felt like things were so awful I almost couldn't handle it, I am thankful for the experience. I DID handle it, and I am a higher me because of that. The same is true for him.
We're getting married soon and there is no one who has ever come closer to knowing me the way that he does and vice versa. I know when he's having a difficult time with something, even if we haven't talked in hours. He'll text me just as I pick up the phone to text him. It's become normal now.
Our relationship is so deeply fulfilling in a brand new way. I'm so filled with love that I only focus on giving. I very rarely think about myself at all in the relationship. It is all about loving him, and it's so natural that I don't even notice. He does the same thing. He tells me that he just feels completely fulfilled in every way. It shows, because he only focuses on giving as well.
This is brand new for me and I believe it is a Hallmark of the twin soul relationship. There's just love. That's all there is. Even when things are frustrating or disappointing or downright heartbreaking, there's still so much love that is permeates everything about the relationship.
I told you my personal story firstly because I want you to know that I know from first-hand experience how a twin soul relationship functions. Secondly, I tell you the above story because I am about to tell you the juicy stuff that you're truly interested in, HOW I MANIFESTED MY TWIN SOUL RELATIONSHIP. And I absolutely did manifest it, very deliberately.
I journal daily. I spend an hour or so in the evenings writing about my thoughts, feelings and experiences. I have a detailed record of exactly what I did, pretty much step by step, to manifest this twin soul relationship into my life.
Before we get to that however, know that when you meet your twin soul, one thing is for sure: this person will shatter your paradigm of what you previously thought love was. My fiance'/twin soul tells me that it was like entering a different dimension. There was the old way of loving, and he described this as "an illusion," and the new way of loving, that he calls "the real way."
Before this can happen, you must let go of the past. You must forgive where it is necessary. You must forgive others and yourself.
Step 1: Make a Definite Decision (an Intention) That You WILL Be With Your Twin Soul
The advice here is to make a commitment. Make a DEFINITE decision that you WILL meet and be with your twin and that you will settle for nothing less. When you make this statement it must be in the present tense: "I am in a close and loving relationship with my twin soul now."
You must also know that you're ready right now.
You MUST declare that you're ready NOW and you must mean it. How do you mean it is you don't really mean it yet? You pretend that you mean it. Just say it, out loud, and with all the conviction you possibly can. My exact statement that I used to manifest my twin soul was: "I am in a close and loving relationship with my twin soul now, and I am completely ready for this relationship to continue to grow and evolve each day."
I wrote this intention down on an index card and I carried it around with me everywhere. Several times a day, I'd take it out of my pocket and read it. This wasn't just a rote reading, I felt as if it were true. It is essential that you feel the feelings that your will feel when you are in a happy, close and loving relationship with your twin soul. As you read the statement, close your eyes and feel as if you're in the closest, most deeply, truly loving, most blissful relationship you can imagine. You only need to do this for about 20-30 seconds at a time. I actually say a timer every hour, read the intention statement out loud and then closed my eyes for about 30 seconds and felt the feelings of being in that amazing relationship with my twin. It took practice, but after a couple days I could really get into the feeling.
Feelings are STRONG attractors. But you can't attract anything sitting on a couch just feeling.
So that brings me to step 2...
Step 2: Date Around and Follow Your Intuition
I don't know what the deal is with the massive amounts of resistance people seem to have to this suggestion, but my goodness, for the love of all that is good and holy, DATE AROUND.
Date as many men as possible. Think of a date as a brief meeting with a guy to see if you like him. It means nothing more than that. You aren't obligated to hug him, or kiss him. Heck, you're not even obligated to stay until dessert (although I make politeness a policy).
Before I met my twin, I made it a goal to date four men a week. The key is, not going on a second date if the guy doesn't ring your "I KNOW he's my twin soul" bell.
Have fun dating. Enjoy meeting new people, and of course, be safe. Laugh and be friendly. BUT, trust that you will know when the person sitting across from you (or in my case, walking down the beach beside you) is your twin soul. You will ABSOLUTELY know, I promise you. Every part of you will light up with a YES.
Step 3: Forgiveness
I guess it might seem like you should forgive BEFORE you start dating. However, the reason I dated while I was practicing forgiving was because I had declared to the universe that I was ready now. I didn't say, "I'll be ready when I have forgiven everyone for everything." Nope, there were no conditions that needed to be met in order for me to be ready. You are ready NOW. NOW. NOW.
Even though you are ready right now, forgiveness will open you up even further to meeting your twin. It's also great for your spiritual, mental, emotional and physical health.
Forgiveness is not pardoning another's sins. It is not making it okay for that person, or anyone else, to hurt you again. Forgiveness is a decision that you make to stand in your own power, and be the presence of love in your own life. When you forgive someone, you are essentially saying that you're not going to allow what that person did to make you feel anything negative anymore. You're acknowledging that you're the power in your life, and no one has the ability to make you feel anything.
Forgive everyone you can think of that upset your in any way, big or small. Do this daily.
How I forgave:
I came from a ten year marriage to an abusive alcoholic. I was very angry and blamed him for so much. I essentially blamed him for every issue in my life.
I knew that if I didn't forgive him, I'd never be able to open up completely to a twin.
I started with the Ho’oponopono prayer. This is a Hawaiian practice of forgiveness and deep healing.
To be clear, at first it was just words, it became feeling after a few days of practicing diligently.
Everyday I said the prayer for about five minutes, over and over. The prayer has four parts, said out loud or silently, and they are as follows:
- "I am sorry." Whether you believe that you've been wined and deserve the apology, or you feel that you're somewhat to blame, saying, "I am sorry," is an extremely powerful way of accepting responsibility. It could be said that a twin soul relationship is one in which you take 100% responsibility for the well-being of the relationship. Get the practice in now. Acknowledge the oneness that we all are in this universe. If you want to truly forgive, you would do well to recognize that the other person IS you, and you are him/her. I touch on oneness a bit, but if it's a subject you'd like to know more about, please Google it. It's worth learning about.
- "Please forgive me." Again, this is about accepting your part in creating the situation. For me, I need to say this over and over because at first I actually felt angry at the thought of him forgiving me. It seemed like he should be begging me for forgiveness. I kept saying it, and I started to see some ways that I contributed to his drinking, and some ways I was cold and distant and very critical. I truly started to feel remorse, and this shifted the way I saw him. It was MUCH easier to truly forgive him when I realized that he wasn't just evil. Asking for forgiveness is your way of again, acknowledging that you're 100% responsible for your life and your relationships, and that we are all one. Him/her forgiving you is the same as you forgiving them and that is the same as you forgiving some neglected or denied parts of yourself.
- "Thank you." Thank you for forgiving me. Thank you for teaching me valuable lessons. Thank you for helping me to evolve into a person who can now have a close, loving and happy twin soul relationship.
- "I love you." When I would say this, I would imagine a beam of white light coming out of my heart and into my ex-husband's heart.
As much as you can, FEEL each step of this. Feel the remorse and reaching out with warmth of "I'm sorry" and "please forgive me" and feel the expansion and joy of "Thank you"and "I love you."
The second part of my forgiveness exercise only took a minute or two. I would pray for him. Not just a prayer of "I hope you're okay", but a deep, sincere prayer of wanting the very best that life has to offer for him, all the love and money and joy possible and asking God to bless him. (Replace God with whatever word feels suitable for you).
Oh yes, my friend, this was NOT easy the first time.
Each morning, I would sit and pray that he would have deep, true love, wealth and abundance, joy, laughter, adventure and all of the good things he needed and wanted. I asked God to bless him.
A very interesting thing happened on the third day of this forgiveness practice. I felt physically lighter. I actually felt that something in my body that weighed me down significantly, that I didn't even know was there, was removed. It was a physical sensation that was as real as if I had a weighed vest on all day and finally took it off. It was incredible.
Another very interesting thing happened. My ex and I had been at war before I began this practice. We couldn't be in the same room together without arguing. Everything I wanted for the kids, he opposed. It seemed like he was even going to try to take me to court for custody.
After a few days of this forgiveness exercise, that all stopped. He suddenly started to offer to help the kids with their homework. He was much more agreeable and we were using words and phrases with each other such as "Good idea!" Or, "If that works best for you." It was a miracle.
Step 4: See EVERYTHING as Love
Treat EVERYTHING and EVERYONE as if they were your twin soul as often as humanly possible (all day every day is ideal). Remember that the universe is like a mirror, reflecting back to you your inner condition all the time. If you are constantly in a state of deep love and appreciation for your twin soul everywhere, the universe will reflect back to you a twin soul to feel deep love and appreciation for. If you pet your dog, pet him like you would pet your twin. When you're talking to your children, talk to them like you would your twin.
When I was manifesting my twin soul, I would purposely feel as if everything around me were made of love. The clothes I was wearing were wrapping me in love, the food I ate would full me with love when I swallowed it, even the air itself, all around me, crackled and sparked with love.
I would pretend to make love to things. Yup, you read that correctly. Part of the twin soul relationship is deep sexual bonding. I'd feel as if I were making love to the trees as I walked by them, to my blankets that covered me at night, etc. Everything in my world became the twin.
This is POWERFUL. The more intense you can feel this and the longer you can maintain this feeling, the quicker you'll manifest your twin.
Step 5: Prepare
Preparing your physical environment and your body is extremely important for your twin soul to come in.
The first thing I did was to get rid of anything related to past relationships. It may be hard to believe now, but I promise that it's truth, when you meet your twin, you will feel a superficiality and falseness about every relationship you had previously. It's not that they were bad, they simply lacked the depth and the truth of the twin soul relationship.
If you must keep something, it would be best to put it in storage or out of sight. Throwing it out or giving it away is best though.
I then made room in my home for my twin to be in. Clear room in your home for you twin to use. Clear out half the closet, leave half the bathroom cabinet empty and if you drink coffee, throw out the mismatched coffee mugs and buy two matching mugs. Clear space and but a second night stand for your twin's side of the bed.
Think of it as if your twin is arriving tomorrow and you will live very happily together. What would you need to do to be ready for that?
Keeping in mind that YOU ARE READY NOW, look around your life AND notice where you can prepare for the happiest, closest, most deeply, truly loving relationship with your twin. Say to yourself, "I'm so excited that my twin soul is in my life now, he/she is moving in next week! What do I need to do to prepare?"
I made a list in my journal throughout my day of all the things I noticed needed to be adjusted for my twin to be in my reality. I threw out all of my old clothes and emptied half my closet. I asked the office manager of my condo complex for a second parking space and paid the extra $10 a month for it. I bought matching bathrobes.
Let this be fun and easy.
Step 6: Visualize with Deep Feeling
Using an intention statement you'll have created by the end of this prescription, visualize this statement as true at least once per day.
I would play music and I just imagine exactly how I want my relationship to be, especially how I want it to feel. More than visualizing it though, FEEL as if it is true. It's much more important that you feel the feelings that you would feel if the statement were true than it is to see a picture in your head. The feeling is what attracts. What does it feel like to have a close, joyful, loving relationship with your twin soul?
Feel that feeling as often as possible. The more your can carry that feeling, the better. Live with that feeling in your heart, no matter what is going on around you.
When people are rude or cruel, still feel that love and joy in your heart. No matter what mood you're in, and no matter where you are or what you're doing, flood yourself with the specific feeling that you would feel if your had that incredibly wonderful relationship now.
This is not always easy to remember, so it's helpful to set aside time to visualize. I prefer the morning and night. Put on headphones, play one or two songs that really move you into a space of feeling deeply in love and get lost in a fantasy. Let your imagination carry your away to the place that feels like the most in love, the most beautiful. Get INTO it.
If you do this right before bed, it'll be most effective.
Step 7: Bless Others
When you see other couples together and in love, or getting married or anything else that you want for yourself, bless them and think how lucky you are to have a loving relationship like that.
I used to seek out happy couples to bless. If I saw a couple being loving and sweet to one another, I'd actually tell them how wonderful I thought they were abs that I wished them a lifetime of love and joy.
Seek out opportunities to congratulate marriages, to get excited for newly in love friends, to celebrate engagements, etc. Remember that we are all one, and what you bless in another, you will be blessed with.
Step 8: Act As If
Make a list of all of the things that you will do when you meet your twin soul. What special things will you do with them?
Will you travel? Will you go sky diving?
I came up with a list of eight things. Some of them were big things that I needed a bit more time to do. I wanted to start right away, so I chose the most doable thing to start immediately. For me it was dance lessons. I took swing dance lessons. I didn't need a partner for the lessons, but I can't swing dance by myself really.
Interestingly enough, my fiance'/twin and I love to dance together. We danced on the sidewalk an hour after we met and we still dance almost every day.
Step 9: Be Whole Now
I've always gone for walks as part of a spiritual practice. When I would go for walks when manifesting my twin, I'd intentionally feel wholeness.
Wholeness is a feeling of being great as you are. If you've ever felt perfectly content and happy, like nothing needed to change and you didn't want or need anything, and you felt good as you were, that was a moment of feeling wholeness.
In the past, it was always a fleeting feeling of being content. Now, I can feel whole at will.
The trick is to get very present and ground yourself in your body. Then just realize that you're alive. You truly only need very few things: air, water, food and shelter. Everything else is superfluous. You have everything you need right now, and nothing that you could acquire could possibly add anything to you. Nothing can truly be taken from you either. It can only disappear from your perception. But you are still intact.
You could also generate feelings of wholeness by knowing that anything you seek outside yourself is actually within your already. You want a feeling of peace? That feeling is created within you. One could be tranquil in a war if they know how to generate their own emotions, or they could feel anxious in a monastery if they have no control over their emotional states.
You want a twin soul relationship because you want deep love. Deep love will always ONLY be created within you. Being with a twin soul is only a condition that makes it easier to have those feelings. But you can feel everything you would feel with a twin right now. You don't need anything external to give you any feeling.
I generated so much love out of a feeling of wholeness while in the practice of manifesting my twin. I'd feel surrounded by a deep love, like it was radiating from the trees and the birds and the sky. I felt it so truly and deeply that I honestly felt like I didn't need a twin soul to show up. THAT IS THE KEY! When you get to a state of feeling almost like you couldn't care less if it manifests because you already have it on your life now, you're already saturated with all the feelings it would bring you, THIS IS WHERE YOU WANT TO BE.
This may take time. Feel surrounded by deep love and feel whole every moment you can until you feel that you are perfectly okay on your own. It's SOO INCREDIBLY important that you feel whole and complete. How do you know when you are whole and complete? You will feel like if your twin soul came into your life right now, that'd be great, but if he or she doesn't ever come into your life, you'd be totally okay. Keep in mind that regardless of whether you can get to that feeling now, you ARE READY RIGHT NOW. This is a practice that will help you to feel more and more whole, not something that you need to get "right" before your twin soul comes into your life. You are ready and worthy RIGHT NOW. This is so important and cannot be overstated. When you can feel that you already have a wonderful twin soul relationship so strongly that you don't even feel like you want it anymore, that you're surrounded by it, you create miracles. Know that you're ready and worthy NOW. You don't need to change anything about yourself or your life. You can prepare, but nothing in your life and certainly nothing about yourself needs to be changed. Say to yourself, "I'm ready NOW for a close, joyful, loving relationship with my twin soul. I'm ready NOW."
Step 10: Integrate This Into Your Life
This is not something you do once and then you're done. You wouldn't want to do this as a practice until you're in a relationship with your twin and then stop. NO, this needs to become a habitual part of your life.
It took some doing, but the practices I've described above are part of me. I'm not perfect, so I sometimes forget to forgive or I can't visualize in the morning etc. For the most part though, I've really simplified the practices above so that they easily fit into even my busiest days. Part of the reason for this is that I've shifted my way of thinking so that now I don't have to set aside time to practice, I'm making love to my steering wheel almost on accident, because it's just what I do. Much like after some time a vegan doesn't have to remember to not ready animal products, it has become who I am.
Practice faithfully and you will not only manifest your twin soul relationship, but you'll be able to create a relationship that grows closer and that evolves into even deeper and truer love over time.
Step 11: Make the Practice FUN
This is actually very underrated. Be lighthearted about this. Approach this entire thing as a fun and wonderful experiment, asking yourself, "I wonder what will happen if I do this..."
Don't take any of it seriously. You need to have the attitude of: "If it works to manifest my twin soul relationship, that's awesome, but if it doesn't, I wonder what other, even more amazing things it will bring me?"
Whatever you can do to make this fun and easy will make it something that you'll naturally want to do, and it's much more likely to become a habit that way.
Writing an Intention Statement
An intention statement can be as simple or complex as you like. Just remember that you'll be saying it several times daily, so it might be better if it's simpler.
Get into the state of having the twin soul relationship that you desire right now. Really feel it.
Now, describe that wonderful relationship. Record your voice of possible, or write it down.
Be open to your twin not looking like you would expect. I discourage you from writing down any physical attributes. You could be preventing your twin from being delivered to you.
Focus on the positive FEELINGS. "We laugh and play and we both love it so much", "we bond powerfully when we make love," etc. State all of this in the present tense, using deep emotional words. Focus only on the key things that are most important to you.
Then, end the statement like this:
"My twin soul relationship is all of these things and/or much better. I am so thankful to have my twin soul relationship now. It is done."
My intention statement as an example:
I am blissfully married to my twin soul. We are the very best of friends, closer than I imagined possible. We have AMAZING, deeply satisfying sex that bonds us on the very deepest level. We powerfully, effectively and efficiently create the very best united life. We are perfect compliments and we are both in awe of how perfectly we fit together. We are successful business partners, thoroughly enjoying growing a business together. We are tenderly warm and gentle lovers who are INCREDIBLY sensitive to each other's needs and desires. Each of us puts the other before self. We have an amazing time together, we laugh and play often and we prefer each other's company to all others. We understand each other on EVERY level and love each other unconditionally, holding each other in positive regard no matter what. We trust each other entirely in every way. We have a deep psychic connection and have a lifetime's worth of meaningful conversation in a moment of silence. It's the most natural thing in the world for us to read each other's minds and sense each other's hearts. We heal each other through touch and just by being in close proximity. We uplift and empower one another and peacefully help each other to be our very best selves. We are peaceful, effective and loving co-step-parents, helping our children be their best selves. We create a loving and peaceful, beautiful home together.
We are these and a million other even better things and we are both grateful beyond words for each other.
EVERY day we are closer, more healthfully united and more truly, deeply in love with each other. We evolve and become our higher selves through our relationship. We choose and commit to loving one another joyfully and with deep, heartfelt gratitude, every moment of every day.
My twin soul relationship is all of these things and/or much better. I am so thankful to have my twin soul relationship now. It is done
Summary of the steps for your easy reference:
Step 1: Make a Definite Decision (an Intention) that You WILL Be With Your Twin Soul
If you're in a relationship already with your twin soul, then your intention could be to have a relationship that grows more truly, deeply loving, more warmly close, more joyful and more sexually fulfilling and satisfying each and every day.
Write your intention statement and read it often throughout the day, giving yourself 30 seconds to feel as if it's true.
Step 2: Date Around and Follow Your Intuition (Send love and healing, blessing light to twin once you're in a relationship)
Date and know that you'll know if he's your twin. When you manifest your twin, wherever you remember, send him love by saying, and feeling: "I love you and I bless you".
Step 3: Forgiveness
Daily practice of forgiving all who have upset you with the Ho’oponopono prayer (I'm sorry, please forgive me, thank you, I love you) and pray for the person's best life and bless them.
Step 4: See EVERYTHING As Love
Simple. See and feel as though everything were made of love. Make love to everything and treat everything as if it's your twin soul.
Step 5: Prepare
Pretend your twin is in your life and he's moving in and/or you're getting married. What would your do to get ready and make room for that?
Step 6: Visualize with Deep Feeling
Every morning and every night, play music and fantasize the relationship.
Step 7: Bless Others
Bless everyone who has the relationship your want.
Step 8: Act As If
What will you do once your twin is in your daily life? Do it now.
Step 9: Be Whole Now
Know that your are complete and you have everything you want within you.
Step 10: Integrate This Into Your Life
Simplify it and practice daily
Step 11: Make the Practice FUN
Do what you need to do to make it enjoyable.