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Uncontrolled Love

A Short Story

By TiaraPublished 6 years ago 9 min read
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Hi, I’m Jess, just an average high school student. I am sixteen and I am on my school's football team. Most high school kids have a boyfriend or girlfriend. Many even like someone, and that's where I, I guess, would “fit in.” Last year, sophomore year, I met this wonderful and amazing girl, her name is Leah, the most beautiful on the cheer team.

When we met it felt like it all clicked in, have I met the girl of my dreams?

I still remember the day, one of the worst days of my life. Leah had already been absent for a couple of days. It all seemed strange to me, so I decided to go check up on her. I knew where she lived since we worked on a science project together. I walked up and ... hesitated, I was too scared to knock on the door, but I had to, I cared for her too much.

As her mother opened the door she looked at me with a sad and shocked look on her face. “Hello, Jess ... how are you,” she asked with pauses between, “would you ... like to come in?” In a soft tone, I responded with, “of course Mrs. Gilmore.”

Everything felt strange. The house was completely quiet. Leah came downstairs to see who was here, she felt rushed. As soon as she saw me, she stopped and she started to tear up. I was so confused as to what was happening. I walked over to her and gave her a hug. She then took me up to her room and she sat down on her bed.

“Jess, I have something to tell you and it's bad,” she told me. I heard her voice shaking like if she were nervous, I was too. “What is it, Leah? Are you okay?”

And then she told me, “Yesterday when I went to the doctors, we ... got the news that I have a tumor.” I was in shock, I didn’t know what to do, all I could do was be there for her, I was speechless. “Leah, I am so sorry, I wish I can help.”

Silence filled the room, I stayed with her until it turned dark. I didn’t want to leave her, but I had to. I couldn’t even imagine what her family was going through at the moment especially her. My only question was, what is going to happen now? I wanted to tell her that I liked her ever since I met her but one, I didn’t know what she would say and two, if it was a good time.

A week later I decided to text her. I asked her how she was doing with everything and she responded with the famous “I’m fine.” I couldn’t wait any longer, it had to be said at that moment because then I wasn’t going to be able to. I sent it, the long paragraph of me spilling my feelings on her, how I felt about her all this time and all I had to do now was wait.

She was typing and I was too scared to even open the text. My anxiety was slowly crawling all over me each second I saw the dots move on the screen. “Wow, Jess, I didn’t know you felt this way about me, ever, because, I have to be honest with you but I think I’ve liked you too.”

That was not the response I imagined for! I felt happy, if the world had stopped for the shortest second. Now all I can think about was her, picturing us together, I just didn’t know if she would want a relationship right now at this time. So that had to be found out. I’m not in control of her sickness nor who she loves nor the time I have. I felt under pressure but I knew I had to take things easy.

It was the next day and I decided to be a strong and confident and be straightforward with the question, if she wanted to become something real with me. As I got to her house I saw her mother leaving for work. Maybe this was a good time to talk to her with no interruptions whatsoever. As I knocked I was hit with that nervous feeling across my face again.

We started talking about things and of course, I asked how she was doing with everything and when she responded I heard a slight wave of happiness in her voice. She got to ask me before I even had the chance to and that took so much weight off my back. “So what now?” Leak asked. To sort of cover up things I played dumb and responded with, “What do you mean?”

She told me that after we both confessed that we liked each other, she wanted to know what was going to happen next. We definitely had to talk about that topic. I decided that we can start talking and if things went well we can start dating. She agreed.

Every morning I would wake up a couple of minutes earlier than usual, make breakfast, for two, and head on out to Leah’s house. We would eat our breakfast together and talk and laugh. When it was getting a little late I would say my goodbyes and go to school. I loved doing this, making her and myself happy at the beginning of the day. A great way to start my mornings.

Two months later and Leah had already started losing her hair due to all the chemo and radiation. She still looked beautiful as ever. I continued to go over to her house every morning and if I couldn’t I would stop by after school.

If I had practice that day, I would go pick her up and take her out to eat or her mom would make us food. One day I decided to leave practice earlier. I went home and cleaned up, before I went to Leah’s house I stopped by a nearby market and I bought her a bouquet of roses. When I arrived at her house and the ambulance was there.

I got the roses and ran upstairs to her room where I saw her laying in bed with paramedics surrounding her taking notes on what just happened. When they left I asked what happened, I was so terrified, both for Leah and her mom. Her mom told me she had a seizure and she called an ambulance because she panicked and didn’t know what to do.

I walked over to her bed and showed her the roses. I saw her eyes sparkle with joy when she saw me. “I got these for you babe,” I told her while I laid down next to her. It hurt me seeing her connected to all these wires. “I was going to take you out to dinner and there I was going to ask you to be my girlfriend but instead I came to this, I’m so sorry you have to go through this babe.”

She smiled, as a tear ran down her face. Later that night I got a message, it was from Leah. “Yes,” she responded, “I will be your girlfriend, and don’t worry I will be strong and get through this.” The world stopped again, I was so lucky and glad.

Three months passed by. I went with her to one of her weekly check-ups. The room was so bright and the doctors were so nice and warm-hearted. They made you feel like you were safe with them. No wonder Leah loved coming here weird as it sounds. The oncologist came in and proceeded to do what he always does, ask questions, check blood pressure, temperature, etc. This time she had to get a PET scan which shows where the tumor is, and the mass to see if it had gotten smaller or grew larger.

Two hours went by, when she came out the doctor came and told us he will have the results shortly since he didn't have many patients that day. The anticipation was growing on us, “shortly” was becoming longer and longer or it could have been our nerves stretching.

In the meantime, Leah and I went to get some food from the hospital's cafeteria. The doctor finally walked out with a portfolio, Leah’s portfolio. We all stood up at the same time, synchronized. “I have very good news,” the doctor explained, “the size of your tumor that appeared to have the mass of a golf ball shrunk down to the mass of about a water bottle cap.”

We were all surprised, mainly Leah but it was such good news, it almost felt like a miracle! A smile became visible on Leah’s face as he said “good.” The most content she's probably been in a really long time. When they dropped me off at my house Leah walked me to the door. Yes, it should have been the other way around but what I had to say was going to cover it. As we got to the door I turned to her and said “I love you, Leah,” while holding her hands and looking into her hazel eyes. “I love you too Jess.”

We ended the night with a kiss. I was positive it was one of the best days ever both for her and me. Everything was at ease, I was so proud of her for being so strong through this tough road in her life not everyone knows how to walk or won’t ever have to walk it. She continued her check-ups and chemo but it was now shortened to every two weeks or if she was lucky three weeks. Did I mention how strong I was for her?

It was another three months that passed and it was time for the next check-up, we hoped for more good news. She had another one of those scans, but this one seemed diminutive in time. As she came out, she ran to me and hugged me then followed by hugging her parents. “I’m free. Cancer free. Tumor-free!” she exclaimed, she cried joyously. The doctor started to walk up to me and I started to become confused. Me? “Son,” there was the famous word, “you should be proud of her, but mostly yourself. I believe you were the cure for her illness, you brought love into her world, and this was definitely a miracle and a story.” I was speechless so I just responded with “Thank you, sir.” I suppose the love I had for her was real and eternal.

Although I couldn’t control how she felt inside and about me, I was able to control myself and how I projected my love towards her. I went with the flow and stuck by her side. Some people may have left someone if they saw them go through all this because it wasn’t only hard for the victim but also for them. I knew she had something in her so I stayed, but just because it may not happen always have hope within you, and wish. Now we just have to see where life will take us next. Another crazy road, but for sure less painful.

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