Unstable and Out of Control

Do you ever find yourself wondering how the people around you can keep their cool even when life happens? Are you someone who can't quite deal with unfortunate events or situations you have no control over? If you answered "yes" then this article is for you. I would like to share my life experience with each of you, and how I manage to overcome.

Up until my late teenage years I have always been a happy person with an innocent soul, then BAM life happened. My first relationship was during my junior year of high school. This relationship lasted for two years. I was very obsessive and protective over my ex, and unfortunately I still care. The goal for us was to get married, have children, and live happily ever after, so I thought. Many of you may have felt this way towards someone you love or loved unconditionally. The hardest part is now having to watching him/her love someone else other than you. Situations such as this causes anger to arise, emotions to build up, and sometimes revengeful thoughts, which is exactly how I felt. Unfortunately, at times there is not much you can do.

It took five years to get over this obstacle because this individual mean't so much to me. During this duration I tried to commit suicide, speak to a therapist, over/under eat, and I was even admitted into a psychiatric hospital. I became unstable and out of control, the person I was becoming became unrecognizable. My life was very dark and for these long moments it felt as if my world stopped spinning. Anger began to form within my soul, negativity took over my mind, hate was placed in my heart, and I felt dangerous. My surroundings made me irritable, I gave my body away, and began to hurt myself though my actions. I felt weak, neglected, alone, lonely, hopeless and hated life.

These ten methods released me from depression and a prisoner mindset:

1. Wrote down my future goals
2. Found a hobby that made me want to get out of bed in the mornings
3. Made other people feel happy by giving because when you make others feel good, you feel good
4. Spoke with my closet family/friends almost everyday for support
5. Listened to positive music, not sad or obnoxious
6. Volunteered and mingled
7. Took myself on dates as a treat
8. Prayed
9. Spoke life to my life
10. Took care of myself, fashionably and health wise

Today at age 23 I can write and say that I made it though my storm. What I have learned is that no matter what difficult situation you face in this lifetime, the hurt and pain won't last forever. You will suffer for a little or sometimes a long while, but eventually life will work out in your favor. I now have my dream job working in a hospital setting, a house, nice car, and a fiancé. Never let life get the best of you because it loves to strike when we are at our lowest point, and when it does it's only to make you stronger as a person. That's growth!