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What are good red flags before committing to courtship?
Before partnership, there is courtship. Where do we begin when we're considering courting?
Does having the right vibe is all we require to begin this connection? Let’s look at this “vibe” for a second, what is it? A vibrational experience or instinctual attractions occurs when looking at a picture that aligns with our ideal desire—like enjoying a song that resonates with our emotions or thinking of someone. This is the most natural way our bodies communicate with the mind.
We can be drawn into someone physical character, but are they the right partner? We need to be cautious of people who depreciate emotional and spiritual connections, or tend to follow the water down concepts and only responding to the physical chemistry (the vibe). A genuine approach when looking for a compatible partner is knowing what you want. Finding a partner is not accidental, it’s intentional.
What are some “red flags” we should never overlook during courting?
We love to connect with other humans, but sometimes we become cemented in enjoying our basic needs getting met. First, we are more conscious than the other primitive creations we share this planet with, although some tend to live only to experience the rush of physical chemistry. We don’t want to get stuck being or dating the serial dater. A serial dater can turn into the cheating mate—someone who doesn’t value time or energy, and put their efforts into quantity versus quality. It’s possible there are issues regarding vulnerability that they are not addressing.
Dominant Personality Traits
The alpha or beta, humorous or the philosopher, spontaneous or practical; what does the ideal partner look like when matching up to your natural characteristics? Being an introvert or an extrovert, how does this affect the connection or growing the connection over time? There’s that old saying “opposite do attract,” but where is this attraction deriving— from the rationale or basic instincts remembering lust expires? When healthy, opposites attract and build a partnership because their weakness and strengths are matching up to balance a good foundation.
Some would agree that sharing the same spiritual beliefs is not necessary to have a fulfilling relationship. Their reasoning: “If a person has good characteristics and we share magnetic chemistry, why should this matter?” The belief system may not seem to be a red flag momentarily, however, it will come as a relationship-saver when the road of partnership gets hard. The spiritual foundation can be a great tool to help smooth the path and get back on the road to recovery.
Short and sweet—what traditions are recognized or not recognized? Outlining your story will help guide your decision making.
Respect is the most important ingredient of any relationship. Being mature about respecting boundaries will lengthen the union. Naturally, there will be conflict in any honest relationship and there’s no way around this; you shouldn’t run from this when having your first big hiccup. Pay attention to how you both deal with the situation. When there’s a disagreement, notice how they/you respond to the indifference. Hopefully, there's never a case where someone is overly sensitive or abusive.
Life partnership is a wonderful gift. Sharing who you are and never compromising your core is amazing, and you should be respected with love, devotion, and compassion.
“Let thy eyes and heart be only for you from this life into the next, forsaking all others, you are thy beginning and thy end forever so let it be.”