What to Expect When Moving in with Your Partner

Whether you wait 6 years or 6 days to move in with a partner, you will learn a lot about them and yourselves as a couple. I moved in with my partner pretty much after 3 weeks but “officially” 3 months. AKA I moved EVERYTHING from my mum's house to his.

I had researched “what to expect when moving in with a partner,” “how to prepare to move in with a partner,” “what to discuss before you move in with a partner,” etc, etc. And whilst it helped, it didn’t cover everything.

1) You. Will. Argue.

You are moving 2 people's worth of stuff into a smaller space. If one person is tidier (my boyfriend) than the other (me), they will get frustrated. We sat down beforehand and agreed on chores we would do, who would cook dinner when. Aaaand it doesn’t work.

Life happens. When you work overtime that week or finish later that shift than planned, you won’t have time or the energy to do those chores or cook that meal (I was usually this person due to my job). And your partner might get mad. But this is where you begin the process of being able to communicate instead of yell at each other.

2) You’ll feel like you have to spend all the time at home with them. 24/7.

You don’t by the way. But you’re like polite friends living together. You don’t want to hurt the other person by going off and doing your own thing at risk of them wanting to hang out.

If you spend all the time in the world together, you will want scream into a pillow and run away because you’ll end up feeling smothered. We definitely did.

We had a phase where we would work, wait for the other to get home, and then just sit watching TV... and then bicker. It didn’t help that I moved from a city with few friends to a town with no friends.

We eventually got comfortable with each other and didn’t feel the need to be so polite all the time, we just wondered off and did our own thing some evenings. It helps when you give each other space. Even if it’s a 20 minute run and that shower time. Means you got time to do YOU.

3) You really have to let your walls down because they see stuff maybe no one else has seen.

For me, this was my partner seeing me having a panic attack. I’ve had functioning anxiety since I was a young child due to bullying, so I look like I’m coping and I can talk to anyone in the world. But as soon as I’m by myself, all the over thinking and suppressed panicking just shows.

My partner was the first person to see me have a panic attack, and I found it embarrassing. I looked so weak and frail. But he held me and loved me. Not all partners do that, that’s just not who they are. But you’ll learn about your partner as a person from these situations.

I’ve seen my boyfriend crying his eyes out when he was poor or going through some heavy stuff and we learnt more about each other during those moments. But... like I said. It can be embarrassing. Especially if you have no control over the situation.

It’s about growing as a couple, which also brings so many positive reasons to do it.

Here’s some:

1) You live with your best friend.

The person who knows how to make you laugh constantly and the best way to comfort you is always there when you come home. Had a bad day at work? Commute home, get in and there is the one person to cheer you up.

2) You learn to spoil each other in a different way.

Forget flowers, chocolates, and bubbly (sometimes, not all the time), but you find that you learn to appreciate the smaller gifts. Such as having the dishes or bathroom tidied so you don’t have to do it. Or maybe having the dog walked by your partner just so you don’t have to face the horrible weather.

Romance doesn’t die, just the materialistic side of it is saved for more special occasions.

3) You learn to communicate properly.

Like I mentioned earlier, you learn to talk through stuff instead of screaming then storming off home.

You learn to express yourself and you learn how to read your partner better. Their body language, choice of language, and their habits.

It creates for a healthier relationship because you learn that they like their socks folded that way or which smell of body wash they like. It’s just being aware of the smaller things in life.

I hope this helps, and makes some of you wiser as to moving in with your partner, along with more excited.

It’s a fantastic step forward and really puts you through a test as a couple but the rewards are endless.

Happy reading.