Lena Bailey
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Dating Older

A Good Choice

Before I met my fiancé, I used to date men who were 10+ years older than me. I was sure that I would end up with one of them, but I eventually ended up with a guy only seven years older than me. Yes, I said only. After you date someone 20 years older than you, seven years seems really small. My fiancé actually told me that his dating age range was four years older or younger, but when I messaged him, he threw it out of the window. He was really surprised by me, but he was also happy that he loosened up his age guidelines.

If you are getting your life together or already have your life together, dating older may be a great decision for you. More than likely, older people have their stuff together and they love the attention of younger people. They also sometimes feel like they're being kept young by us. It's also a great way for them to pass on what they've learned while they could also learn new things. I dated a guy who was 18 years older than me and I treated him to movies that I liked and visa versa. We stayed friends after we realized we wouldn't work as a couple. We learned so much from each other, and he took care of me when my grandmother was sick. I don't know what I would have done without him.

A lot of women may want an older partner, if she has kids or something else in her life, that would call for her partner having a higher maturity level. Men may have things in there lives that may call on an older partner in their life, too. I have an anxiety disorder, so I need a man with a high level of maturity to handle my anxiety. Immature men won't be able to handle mental illness very well. Mature men know that you can't help certain things like mental illness.

When my mom found out about the older men, she was like, "You know what? You get out of the house, he's mature, he's teaching you to be a better woman." She was right.  The men and women who are into it know this to be true—older men and women have a lot of qualities that their younger counterparts don't. Of course, there were some men I dated that were older but weren't mature that my mom, friends, and I all laughed at.

Now obviously we have to use our heads about this, like we would about any kind of dating or relationship. No dating older people if you are younger than eighteen. It's illegal. Also, not all older people are worth it. There are older people who are abusive, crazy, immature, and manipulative. Older people don't always make better partners, just like younger partners make immature partners. So be careful about who you date. If you are with an immature, abusive, crazy, or manipulative person, please leave.

Now, honestly, there will be haters. I worked at a movie theater when, one day, an older man came in with his date (who was younger). When they passed by us, the girl who was working with me and a customer said some jokes and inappropriate things. I about said, " Hey, I bet she's happy and the sex is probably fantastic."

A lot of people think that an older partner will take advantage of their younger partner, but that that's not always the case. Some older partners do take advantage of younger people or manipulate them, but that's just a few of them. I really liked most of my experiences with older men.

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