The Winners and Losers From Elementary School Graduation

I was in fifth grade; tall, smart, studious and athletic. I loved to swim, had a few really close friends, good grades, and a happy family to go home to everyday. My parents kept my busy with swim class, after school activities and a brother and sister each to chase after constantly, but despite all that, I was a daydreamer. I loved music and was actively playing piano as well as just beginning to write my own songs at the time. I was a happy kid, and life was easy. This is the story of one of the fondest memories of my childhood.I was on my way to the school play auditions with my best friend, Alice*. She is a phenomenal singer, and had wanted to audition for the part of the Narrator in our school play. It was a big role, but her audition killed it. She ended up getting the part, but because the role had so many lines, the directors ended up casting two Narrators, and Alice would be singing alongside Marcus*. The moment I laid my eyes on him, I was smitten. He had a sweet face, and a devious smile that was a cross between "I'm-definitely-up-to-something" and "we-should-cuddle-sometime." Overtime, I learned that he was in the advanced learning program, (a.k.a., smart kids class) was half Chinese and half Caucasian, and he was also a studied classical singer. I could have married him on the spot, I was so in love! The story continues in that Alice went to practice two to three times a week with Marcus, and I would always be waiting for her outside her classroom at 5:00 PM. We walked home together everyday, and on days that she would have practice with Marcus, I would garner a simple 'hello' from the boy I was infatuated with. This went on for the next two years, right into 7th grade where graduation would mean that not only would I be going to a different high school from Alice, but I would also be moving away from Marcus, too. And while Alice had known all along that I was in love with Marcus, word of it did not slip until the last two weeks of graduation. I can remember coming to school, excited to be graduating and moving up to a newer, bigger school. I had already picked all my classes and was eager to start the best five years of my life. But in those last two weeks of school, my classmates seemed to be acting very strange around me. Some stared curiously, while others whispered like the do in the movies when people talk about someone while they walk by. Then, there was Marcus. "Hey, Delilah. So, I wanted to ask you something. Is that okay?" That simple question from a simple boy was a defining moment in my elementary school career. We had stayed "friends" (or perhaps closer to acquaintances, really) over the years, and while I primarily remained in the shadows as the tall, bookish Asian girl who always sat at the back of the classroom with her nose in a book, Marcus had thrived socially, probably not even recognizing his own popularity within the school. Girls crushed on him to no end, and if elementary schools had valedictorians, he would certainly be the only real contender.

"Yeah, of course. What's up?"

"I'm wondering if you are going to graduation with anyone."

"Not really... unless you count Alice..."

"Great. Do you want to come to graduation with me?"

Dramatic pause for effect, because I'm pretty certain my heart stopped for a few seconds here.

"Yes, sure!"

"Perfect. I'll pick you up at 6 PM." This was, of course, followed by one of his cute, crooked smiles.

No wonder everyone was acting so weird. They knew something I didn't: that I was the lucky girl going to graduation with the cutest guy in school. Fast forward to graduation; he and his mom came to pick me up from my house, and coincidentally we wore matching red, him in a red dress shirt and black tie and suit jacket and me in a red, off the shoulder top that definitely made my swimmer's shoulders look bigger than they already were (the pictures continue to embarrass me to this day). He had even bought me a corsage and with the help of my mom, I eventually pressed that flower into an encyclopedia I had, which I'm sure we've given away to charity by now. He was my first slow dance to "A Moment Like This" by Kelly Clarkson, and at the end of the night, we exchanged kisses on the cheek. I was in heaven. Over the course of the summer, we stayed in touch and I got to meet his family and have dinner at their place pretty often. We would take his dog out to the park and hang out, and as much as I was infatuated with him, we mostly just stayed really good friends. And as both of us moved on to our respective high schools, we eventually lost touch with one another. A few years later, I remember sitting in the high school library during lunch hour when it all happened. I often spent most of my lunch hour writing short stories online, and I had Facebook running in the background as I typed. Suddenly, out of the corner of my eye I noticed a notification come through. Switching my page over to Facebook, I clicked on the red notification button and saw a familiar friend request from Marcus pop up on the screen. With a curious raised eyebrow, I accepted his request and even more curiosity stopped my writing to do what any high school girl would do if her youthful crush added her on Facebook: snoop! My heart was in my chest as I scrolled through photos of his family and friends, his dog and his life in high school. Then... the "oh god" moment. Photos of a cute Asian boy. And there he was again. And again. Then, a highlighted caption during Pride Week. That was where it hit me, square in the face.Marcus was Gay. And as surprised as I was, I wondered who else knew. Snooping through his friends list might be going a bit too far in my opinion, and I eventually went back to my writing and let the thought go. We're still Facebook friends, and I am 100 percent sure he's still gay. And while this wasn't exactly a disastrous date gone wrong, it certainly was an interesting time in my life that I will never forget. #myworstdate*Names changed to protect identity